Thursday, December 11

Thankful Thursday - People Pleaser's

Why are so many always on a mission to please others? They knock themselves out trying to satisfy every woe from a whiny group of folks who are absolutely impossible to please!

Many years ago, as a very young, inexperienced, and untrained pastor's wife, my mission was to please everyone. Why? Because that is what I thought ministry was all about. I was constantly trying to figure out if my makeup was acceptable, my clothes, my jewelry, etc. I made every effort to be everything for everyone all the time. Desperately attempting to make everyone happy so the complainers would be satisfied. Of course we all know that is short lived! I came to the place of discouragement, frustration and not wanting to be involved in the ministry with my husband at all. These people were ridiculous and I didn't want any part of it!

Our Heavenly Father did not place you and I on this earth to please people. That isn't our mission friends. We are to please Him by representing a Christ-like life and being examples everywhere we go of our Lord and Savior. I discovered many years ago that life is too short to spend it trying to make everyone happy. Some people will never be satisfied no matter what you do. Jesus could walk down the aisle of the church and they would find fault with Him!

I do what I do because I love the Lord with my entire being. I am who I am and people must accept me as Debbie Shank. I am not going to try to be someone else so I can please those who don't like what I do or what I represent. I am not in the business of intentionally hurting people and ignoring them but I also will not change who I am to please some so they won't complain. Some people need to grow up and start thinking about others instead of always focusing on what they want in this life.

Have you noticed that those who complain the loudest do less in the church than anyone else? And no matter what is done in the church, they gripe about it. They always have a better way of doing whatever it is you are doing but they never volunteer to do it.

The folks who chronically complain can absolutely steal our joy and make our lives miserable IF WE ALLOW THEM TO BE SUCCESSFUL. I have found over the years that only those I give permission to can intimidate me or make my life miserable. I am in control of this situation. You and I are the deciding factor as to the result of what these people attempt to do with your life. When we are overwhelmed by their criticism and whiny complaints our focus isn't on God and what He can do for us. We are allowing the situation to overpower our emotions. We then become discouraged and frustrated because those are tools of the enemy.

I am in no way advocating being rude or uncaring. What I am advocating is that we are not to be people pleaser's and if that is our mission in this life, we will be miserable. Jesus wasn't a people pleaser. Many became very upset with Him but He had a mission while He was here on this earth and He didn't allow anyone or anything to stop Him.

God created you and I differently. He knew us when we were in the womb. He has a unique work for each of us. I can't be you and you can't be me. We can't be like someone else and accomplish God's will for our life. By reading our Bibles and seeking God's face daily we can have comfort knowing that God will lead and direct us. He will open doors we thought were never possible. Focus on pleasing God - not people.

I am thankful today that I have matured in my walk with Christ over the years and realize that I cannot possibly please everyone.

I am thankful that God has helped me over the years realize that ministry is about Him and His will for my life.

I am thankful for a beautiful family. God has blessed me so much.

I am thankful for an incredible church family. My hubby and I are truly blessed.

Special thanks to our host for Thankful Thursday.

Blessings and hugs!


  1. I remember when I first became active in women's ministry - what an eye opener. It didn't take me long to learn that I will never please everyone and some are more vocal than others. Thankfully, even when I was discouraged He redirected my focus to the purpose of my ministry - Him and Him alone. Blessings!

  2. This is really true! It's nice to do something nice to someone but trying to please people is impossible. I'm glad God is so loving as to let us realize that it is Him we should please.

  3. It is nice to meet you, Deborah. I am so glad you dropped by and thank you so much for your encouraging comments.

    Most of all, though, I thank you for your prayers. Thank you!

    I will be looking around your site today. I hope to talk to you again!

  4. And I am thankful for your post today! This is something that I struggle with... your words remind me to put my focus on what God thinks and what God desires for me.

    Happy Thankful Thursday!


    I am still a new believer. I find it so disturbing how so many want to put me in a nice tidy box with a label. How they don't like when I say how we have changed our lives so much for Him - like I'm judging them. I'm not worried about if how we live pleases them - my/our only concern is will He say good job faithful servant.

    I never enjoyed being a people pleaser because that never seemed to work. I'm so thankful God taught you that lesson so early in your ministry and now can bless others who are just walking in your shoes with these wise words.

    My husband and I have realized how different we are than most Christians we have met - and we have learned to be OK with that too. We don't want to fit into any box or description other than His adopted children. AMEN!

    You are a beautiful writer and it is wonderful to see God working through you today in such a powerful way. Praying more who need the wisdom you shared today will stop by!

    God bless you and your family!

  6. Thanks Debbie! I needed to read that TODAY!.

  7. Ok well I just had church reading this blog!!! I loveeee your blog and I really encouraged as I read it. Today's post really spoke to huge problem in the Body of Christ today . We were never called to be door mats. The Lord showed me that sometimes my attempts to help kept that person from depending on God. It really made me listen to His leading.
    Great Post!!!


  8. I found you through Denise's blog and I'm so very glad I did becaue this spoke to my heart.

    God has been teaching me this very thing and as I am now moving into the ministry to which he has called me I am finding the lesson to be invaluable.

  9. Great message Debbie...thank you for the reminder!

    Love you


Thanks so much for visiting this site. I pray that Chocolate and Coffee will be an encouragement to you today.

Blessings and hugs!